What the other parent sees on their own phone.Back to the tracking view
Little Wish
Trying for 4 months
Notes
A quick heads-up between the two of you. A note is deleted when one of you clears it or after 60 days, whichever comes first.
From Alex
Heads up: our fertile window started Sun, Oct 11 and runs through Fri, Oct 16 (an estimate) 
Disappears Oct 15 at the latest, or when you clear it.
Pinboard
Notes, reminders and to-dos.
Your focus
Getting ready for a pregnancy, one simple step at a time
Start or continue folic acid today
400 micrograms a day, ideally from at least a month before conceiving. Some people need a higher dose, including those with diabetes, a high , epilepsy treated with certain medicines, or a previous pregnancy affected by a neural tube defect. Ask your doctor if any of these apply.
Book an immunity and medicines check
Ask about rubella and chickenpox immunity, and go through every medicine and supplement you take. If you need the or chickenpox vaccine, the advice is to wait about a month after the dose before conceiving. Don't stop a prescribed medicine without talking to your doctor first.
Sex every day or two when the window is open
That is the five days before ovulation and ovulation day. If you're not tracking, regular sex every two to three days all month covers it just as well. Tracking is optional.
Changes for sperm take about 74 days to show
If the father (or non-carrying partner) is providing sperm and making changes, such as stopping smoking, the sperm that benefit are the ones made over the next two to three months. Starting now is what counts.
Know when to ask for help
See a doctor after 12 months of trying if the mother (or the person who would carry) is under 35, after 6 months from 35 to 40, and right away over 40. Go sooner with known , endometriosis, irregular periods, undescended testes, past chemotherapy, or two or more miscarriages. Asking is not giving up.
Getting ready
The simple, worthwhile steps before a pregnancy. Check them off in any order.
Health
- Check rubella immunityA blood test or your vaccine records will show it. If you need the MMR vaccine, wait about a month after the dose before trying to conceive. Ask about chickenpox immunity at the same time.
- Review medicines and supplementsGo through everything you take with a doctor or pharmacist, including over-the-counter medicines and herbal products. Don't stop a prescribed medicine without advice.
- Bring other vaccines up to dateFlu and any others your doctor recommends can be done now. Tdap comes later, during pregnancy itself, at 27 to 36 weeks of each pregnancy.
- Book a dental checkup if you are overdueDental care is safe in pregnancy, but it is easier to get fillings and cleanings done now than in the tired first weeks.
Lifestyle
- Stop smoking, and ask your partner toSmoking lowers fertility for everyone and affects pregnancy. Vaping is not proven safe either. A doctor, pharmacist or stop-smoking service can help.
- Stop alcohol while tryingYou won't know you're pregnant for the first few weeks, and there is no known safe amount in pregnancy. Stopping now closes that gap.
Partner
- Partner: a checkup and the 74-day clockIf you have a partner, a routine checkup and medicines review is worth doing too. If they are providing sperm, changes like stopping smoking take two to three months to show, so starting now counts.
Planning
- Ask about genetic carrier screeningA blood or saliva test for inherited conditions such as cystic fibrosis. Doing it before pregnancy gives you more options. Both genetic parents can be tested. It is your choice.
- Check what your health insurance covers for pregnancy and fertilityLook up prenatal care, delivery, and whether fertility tests or treatment are covered. Rules vary a lot by plan and by place, so it is easier to know before you need it.
- Look up your parental leaveCheck your employer's policy and what the law where you live provides, for you and any partner. How much notice is needed, and whether it is paid, varies widely.
- Know when you would book a fertility appointmentAfter 12 months of trying if the mother (or the person who would carry) is under 35, after 6 months from 35 to 40, and right away over 40. Sooner with known PCOS, endometriosis, irregular periods, past chemotherapy, or two or more miscarriages.
Completed (2)
- Start 400 mcg folic acid daily
- Book a preconception checkup
For the partner
You're on the team! Trying for a baby is a two-person project, and the father (or non-carrying partner) gets to play a big part. Here are some easy ways to be a great teammate, plus a few simple things that are good for your own health along the way.
Tackle the checklist together
Open the Little Wish checklist side by side and claim a few items as yours, like making appointments or handling the paperwork. Checking things off is more fun as a pair.
Tag along to appointments
Offer to come to preconception checkups and, if it gets that far, fertility appointments. Moral support counts, and if you're the father (or providing the sperm), fertility checks look at your health too.
Let them share in their own way
The cycle log stays on their phone by design, so the app won't show you where they are in the month. Just ask, or they can send you a note here when they want to give you a heads-up. Agree together on how you'd like to share news, then resist the urge to ask "any news?" every few days.
More ways to be a great teammate
Be the one who remembers
Vitamins, dates and reading up can quietly land on one person. Surprise them by taking things off their plate before they ask: meals, errands, insurance calls, a bit of research.
Keep the romance in it
Sex on a schedule can take the spark out of it for anyone. Plan date nights and cozy time that have nothing to do with the calendar, and make it easy for either of you to say "not tonight".
Make healthy habits a team sport
If they've stopped drinking or smoking, join them. It makes it easier for them and is great for you too. Evening walks and new healthy recipes to try together count as well.
Be there on the hard days
A period arriving or a negative test can hit hard, or not at all. Follow their lead. A hug and a simple "I'm here" usually help more than looking on the bright side.
Give your own health a boost
Your health plays a part in this too, and you're worth looking after anyway. The section below has the changes with the strongest evidence, and most of them are pretty easy wins.
Easy wins for your own health
If you're the father (or providing the sperm), good changes pay off in a couple of months
Sperm take a little over 70 days to develop and mature, roughly two and a half months. That means the sperm that could start a pregnancy are being made right now, so anything healthy you start today shows up in a few months. The sooner you start, the sooner it counts!
Well establishedHow sure is this?
Major medical bodies agree on this. Treat it as standard guidance.
Quit smoking and go easy on alcohol
This is one of the biggest wins. Smoking lowers sperm count and movement and increases the number of abnormally shaped sperm. Secondhand smoke also affects the mother (or the person who's trying to get pregnant), whoever provides the sperm. Heavy drinking can lower sperm quality too; UK guidance is no more than 14 units a week, spread over three or more days. You don't have to quit alone: a doctor, pharmacist or stop-smoking service can help.
Well establishedHow sure is this?
Major medical bodies agree on this. Treat it as standard guidance.
Keep things cool down there, within reason
Testicles work best slightly cooler than the rest of the body. Advice to skip long hot tubs and keep laptops off your lap is sensible, and some studies link tight underwear with poorer sperm. The research is not consistent, though, so treat this as a low-cost precaution rather than a fix.
Mixed evidenceHow sure is this?
Studies disagree. Reasonable clinicians land on different answers.
Moving more and eating well helps
Studies link obesity with lower sperm counts, poorer movement and changes in reproductive hormones. If you're carrying extra weight, steady changes to eating and activity are a win for your health either way. It's less clear how much losing weight improves fertility, so it isn't a reason to put off trying.
PromisingHow sure is this?
Some good quality research supports this, but it is not settled science.
Check your medicines and supplements
Testosterone and anabolic steroids not prescribed for fertility can shut down sperm production, sometimes to zero. After stopping testosterone, sperm usually return within about three months. Some prescription medicines and long-term conditions can affect sperm too. Please don't stop a prescribed medicine on your own; ask your doctor whether anything you take matters for trying.
Well establishedHow sure is this?
Major medical bodies agree on this. Treat it as standard guidance.
Get a quick STI check
It's an easy box to check. Infections like chlamydia often cause no symptoms. Left untreated, they can scar the fallopian tubes of the mother (or the person who's trying to get pregnant) and, more rarely, affect fertility in the father (or the person with testicles). Testing is quick and treatment works. Both partners should finish treatment before having sex again.
Well establishedHow sure is this?
Major medical bodies agree on this. Treat it as standard guidance.
This week
Tip
A cup or two of coffee a day is fine while trying
Moderate caffeine, about one to two cups of coffee a day, has not been shown to make it harder to get pregnant. Very high intakes, around five cups or more a day, have been linked with taking longer. Once you're pregnant, most guidance suggests staying under about 200mg a day, so settling near that level now means less to change later.
Mixed evidenceHow sure is this?
Studies disagree. Reasonable clinicians land on different answers.
The studies are observational and disagree with each other. ASRM finds no clear effect at moderate intakes. The 200mg figure comes from pregnancy research, not fertility research, so we do not present it as a fertility limit.
Question
What is the fertile window?
The five days before ovulation plus ovulation day itself. Sperm can survive for several days, but an egg only lasts about a day after it is released. So the best days are the ones leading up to ovulation, not after it.
Myth
You need a stack of preconception vitamins to get pregnant.
Folic acid is the one supplement with strong evidence, and vitamin D follows your country's general advice. There is little good evidence that other vitamins or fertility blends help you conceive. A standard prenatal vitamin covers the basics.
Mixed evidenceHow sure is this?
Studies disagree. Reasonable clinicians land on different answers.
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